“It were a grief so brief to part with thee.
― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet
The next goodbye was tougher. “HAY GIRL!” an almost surprising companion of mine, Bianca who was always smiles, a former alcoholic who gave up for her son, sang at church and worked at an African braiding salon yelled, enveloping me in a massive hug. “My god, Bianca I’ll miss you!” I remarked, my voice cracking a little. With that, she treaded out the wooden doorframe and just like Will, walked out of that Drama class and my life.
I have never been a fan of goodbyes. If I’ve grown accustomed to seeing someone daily, weekly, monthly or even yearly, chances are I’ll tear up, watch Kal Ho Na Ho and throw popcorn at the screen every time somebody dies or goes to pee or something because WHY DO PEOPLE LEAVE MY GOD.
And trust me, I know it's not healthy. Because it's not like I’ve heard the phrase “Duriba beta, that’s life” every time I rant to my mom. But why do people enter our lives, leave Kanye West’s ego size footprints, make Instagram-able memories and then just walk away?
Below are reasons why it’s okay to leave and why people do, you sanctimonious swag-bellied abominations.
1. People leave because they have to.
Have you ever been at a party or something, dancing the night away...fruit punch in your solo cup, head swaying side to side as your friend’s mom complains from downstairs that you guys are shaking the ceiling fan by jumping too much (sorry, Aunty!) and that it’s almost time for Ishaa, and suddenly...you have to pee. But this moment is perfect! It’s the most fun you’ve had in ages, so your bladder needs to not be a sodden-witten rampallian and chill. Did you want to leave? Nope. Did you have to? Yuh. And so you did.
2. There’s no reason to stay.
This is what I firmly believe to hold true in almost every “ok tata bye bye” situation. Most of the time we leave because we seriously don’t need to stay. Either we’re underappreciated, unrecognized, or just aren’t getting what we give. We’re not being respected, cherished, or even understood.
We constantly feel like we’re in a rut. In other words, it’s like the friend you so proudly posted a selfie with and hashtagged #biffle refused to like the picture and *gasp* didn’t even comment (hai, mein marjava). Cruel, isn’t it? You leave that friend, sugar. You walk away, turn around, flip that hair/hijab, and keep on walking. Let out a teeny fart if you that person ever made you cry.
3. It’s too much work.
If you’re ever in a friendship where it just feels like too much work, it’s no longer a friendship. It’s a chore. If you can’t naturally remember their birthday, favorite color, or hobbies they enjoy, it’s safe to say you’re almost indifferent towards them. Which is cool, but don’t waste their time letting them plan sleepovers and manicure dates. Just walk away because what good is a one way street when your Lamborghini needs to make a turn.
It’s dandy to think of walking away after this blog post...but sometimes, you can be on the other end. Sometimes you have to push the other person away because you’re really just adding fuel to the fire and you just want to prevent the Dhoom Machale style explosion.
People enter and leave our lives from various reasons...to teach a lesson, make memories, or ruin your entire life and make you spend every night in bed crying about your fate and poor communication skills, drowning your sorrows in fries and coconut water, and trying to cut your bangs with a pocketknife in a poor attempt to “reinvent yourself.” Either way, that’s life. And someway, somehow...we’re all going to have to learn to be okay with that.