“Time is the most valuable coin in your life. You and you alone will determine how that coin will be spent. Be careful that you do not let other people spend it for you.”
― Carl Sandburg
In fact, I’ve pictured all the possibilities.
A small, teal, victorian style house around downtown with an art gallery and profound garden. A book written, a degree earned. I’ve even pictured inviting neighbors over: placing cute little tea cups and biscuits before them, making anything but small talk. On weekdays, I’ll sit and write in the morning, on weekends I’ll rise early to jog with a friend. Maybe I’ll have a husband, maybe I won’t. I won’t mind if I won’t.
My car will break down for the fourth time, and this time will be the worst. I’ll dial my father, only to realize that I haven’t paid my phone bill. Not because I forgot to, but because I couldn’t afford it. I’ll have the same clothes since the twelfth grade, and they’ll be holes in my shoes. The hot Texas sun will beat against my cheeks through the battered windshield, and I’ll roll the windows down, pretending to help the situation. I’ll pray a little, then fall asleep in the backseat.
A trendy condo in one of the tallest buildings in the world, luscious long hair and long eyelashes. Except I don’t know how my lashes will just become longer. They just will. I’ll likely have a little poodle named something superficial, like “Cinnamon Dolce Latte” or “Coco”. I’ll wear high heels that make my ankles hurt and pretend to enjoy it. I’ll know many famous people, and I’ll wear sunglasses indoors.
The craziest part of it all?
Whether I end up in one of these three scenarios of beyond depends on the choices I make today, tomorrow, and within this next hour.